


I love my Clown of a Man

by MozartKing



Category: MASH (TV)
Genre: Language, M/M, Mpreg, Past Miscarriage
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-05
Updated: 2019-07-05
Packaged: 2020-06-11 15:47:38
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,502
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19542145
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MozartKing/pseuds/MozartKing





	I love my Clown of a Man

"Beej," Hawkeye moaned "yeah Hawke?" "your foot's up my ass, move it" BJ smirked, "how are you feeling Hawke?" smoothing Hawkeye's belly "oh good, except the part, my back's like hellfire and not to mention my damn tits are hurting worse than Igor's cooking but other than that, smashing darling" said Hawkeye 

Bj put his arms around his bump, "you look great to me Hawke" Hawkeye groaned, "this is your fault, you sperm bank bastard, you just had to use that thing like a rocket on the Fourth of July" said Hawkeye,   
"maybe you shouldn't have gotten me drunk first" Hawkeye put BJ's hands closer, "feel that?" "it knows our voices" they smiled   
"CHOPPERS!" said Radar, "damn, can't the army just let us have vacation?" said Hawkeye "maybe next time babe" he kissed his forehead, "can you two PLEASE not do that here while I am getting dressed?" they looked, "sorry Chuck, you want a kiss too?"   
Charles glared, "not even if you were the Queen of England Pierce," "I'll be back in 10 hours flat" BJ kissed him, "get those wet lips over here" Hawkeye pulled him by the collar "who knew you wanted this?" asked BJ "damn hormones." 

BJ and Charles got to the tent, "give me another clamp, and can someone please get the fan in here for fucks sake!"   
Margaret put a rag on his head, "clamp"said BJ "here doctor" "looks like this boy is meant for a puzzle piece set" said BJ, Klinger took the boy out, "can someone PLEASE get better cleaning supplies for this young man" Charles threw the scissors down. 

After 10 hours, BJ ran up to Charles "hey Chuck!" "it is Charles, what do you want Hunnicut?" "I need a favor to ask" Charles raised his brow, "well, we have the time" BJ put an arm around his shoulder walking to the SWAMP. 

They saw Hawkeye sleeping, "I wish I can slap you, now the kid won't calm down," he put his hand on his bump and BJ doing the same "what are you doing here Chuck, the dining hall is that way"   
Charles began his record, "Hunnicut wants me to babysit you while he does the manly work" Hawkeye slapped BJ "I ought to slap you dead silly, and grab the razor to cut that mustache off!" BJ glared at Charles, "I never said babysit or manly work, just thought you wanted company while I worked," BJ regretted his words "so I can't do the work Truman signed me up for?!" BJ put Hawkeye's hands together, "I would never do that to you Hawke, just thought" "Charles, can I borrow that record to break sense in this numbnuts?" 

Charles slid the record away, and went to the Mess Tent "I'm going to eat, maybe the eating will dry me out" BJ ruffled his hair. 

He got his food and saw Hawkeye sitting, "thanks a lot Charles for making it worse than what I had planned" Charles looked, "well, it is true you were trying to have Pierce not do masculine work and sit doing nothing, and do I remember you asking me to babysit a man who can do it?" "why didn't I have sex with you Charles?" Charles glared, "because Pierce, I do not have feelings for a clown who eats with his mouth open while TALKING" 

"did you two fight again, how hasn't Hawkeye already killed you BJ?" questioned Klinger, "you two remind me of these cats I had on the farm, always fighting, making up after but kept doing it over and over again" said Radar, "I'm sorry if my words hurt you so damn badly Radar. Maybe if you get the height fixed we'll be equal SHORTY" Radar's mouth opened, "not even a pregnant woman with hormones gets this crazy" said Father Mulcahy "not all true, Mildred would always threaten to throw the horse shoe at me if I didn't leave her alone while she was pregnant, but maybe giving me one would have helped" said Colonel Potter, "so, what was it this time then?" 

BJ was scared to answer, mostly not liking the face Hawkeye was giving "I said he might want some company while I did the 10 hour shift is all" Hawkeye threw food at him, "you wanted to higher old Charles Winchester the fucking babysitter to watch me" they paused "Margaret, you're a woman, thoughts on this?"   
she moved her hair and smiled, "well first off BJ, you should have talked to Hawkeye about this before you pranced to Charles about it," "HAA" she faced Hawkeye, "and Hawkeye, you can't let stress get to you, it isn't good for the baby"   
Hawkeye breathed out, "maybe you're right, and maybe I do need some company while my strong ass of a boyfriend does the dirty work" BJ flushed seeing a wink, "alright alright, Jesus a Winchester does keep a promise he makes, and can never break a promise a Winchester makes, so I will sit and stare at nothing if it helps dear little Pierce" he saluted, "thanks Chuckle boy, that means gratitude, how do we thank thee?" Charles washed BJ's hand off his shoulder, "but I never said I keep a small promise." 

When BJ had to do the shift, Charles and Hawkeye played chess "so, how does this go again?" Charles tried not to throw the board, "must I go over the rules again Pierce?" he nodded like a child, "FINE, this piece goes here and you must capture my queen" said Charles, "my that does sound fascinating dear old sport, please tell how the violin is made" "shut it PIERCE." They kept playing, "checkmate" Charles looked "I thought you said you do not know how to play?" "well, I did say I didn't know how to play, but you never said I couldn't use a cheat sheet," he showed the paper "if only I can smash a piano on that brain of yours Pierce, then I might enjoy a bit of fun playing with someone else that does not cheat" "dear dear old boy, did I ruin the rhythm, maybe a kiss will make it up?"   
he made kissing noises "ahh" "what's wrong pierce?" Charles got up, hoping Hawkeye's water didn't break "don't waste your breath, my water didn't break yet just the kid wanting to stretch early, maybe if my water breaks you can have some of the fluid for keeping?" 

When the unit was sleeping, BJ heard Hawkeye whimpering "Hawke, what's wrong?" he saw sweat, he put his body close to Hawkeye's, "is it the baby, is the baby kicking your rib again?" "no..Trap..the baby" BJ looked, "Beej?" "I'm here babe" he rubbed Hawkeye's fingers "you heard that?" "all of Korea can hear it, you said Trapper" Hawkeye had a tear, "it was nothing, just the past alright" said Hawkeye "Hawke, I heard you say Trapper and baby, what did you mean by that?" 

Hawkeye made a face, "were you pregnant before?" he cried, "Hawke" he took Hawkeye  
putting fingers on his bump "why didn't you tell me before?" asked BJ in a worried look, "this happened before you showed up in this hellhole, forgot about it till the baby kicked me while I slept,” "what happened, you told me you loved Trapper but what happened before I came?" 

"while Trapper was still here, we had sex a lot till we got to a point where I didn't want to do it much, after getting signs I realized and we were happy, but, when I left to go and help some soldiers that got stuck in a village with Margaret we were hit and I fell on my still flat stomach, I felt pain.   
When we got to a house, I saw blood and Margaret examined me and told me" he sobbed, "after I told Trap what happened he held me tight promising we wouldn't have kids till we got back to the states, but I guess that is late for me" he pushed the curls out his eyes, "I'm so sorry Hawke, that will never happen, I promise." 

Next morning, Hawkeye felt uncomfortable then felt his water break in the Mess Tent, everyone froze "good timing kid, right infront of eating" he laughed when Charles lifted his shoe "HEY the kid kept the promise. 

After hard 12 hours of labor, a clean boy was born "thought of any names boys?" asked Margaret, "didn't think it would be a boy, kicked like Margaret did when she kicked my ass" she laughed "maybe we can call him Trapper or Henry" Hawkeye stared, "Henry Trapper Hunnicut" "I love it Hawke" Hawkeye cooned Henry "who's the godfather, can't have a full house without a godfather" said Radar, "Margaret can be the godmother and Chuck can be the godfather" said Hawkeye "it would be a pleasure" said Charles, "I just want to hug you both" said Margaret "and Klinger, you can be the dresser" "I'll head over to Rosie's RIGHT NOW!"


End file.
